Updated: Apr 19, 2019
The journey into motherhood is different for every woman. It is such a trans-formative, life-altering experience that it's hard to believe there aren't more resources and communities out there to help women as they enter into this chapter of their lives.
So what can we do about the lack of resources and communities? We can start by stripping away the often gilded facade of becoming a mother through honest and open communication about the struggles and beauty in becoming a mother.
Ta'lor Pinkston, the founder of Ladyhood Journey, is on a mission to empower other women to self-love and heal after learning to how to cope and process her own broken dreams. Two weeks before graduating with her master's degree Ta'lor found out she was pregnant "it was never my dream to have a child and be unmarried." Feeling the weight and burden of an unplanned pregnancy Ta'lor fell into a depression. She graduated from college and moved into her mother's for the Summer before moving into a one bedroom apartment with the father of the baby.
"I started panicking, thinking how will I raise this child in a one bedroom apartment. I was looking at my degree thinking why did I even go to school for eight years and I felt like I had let my daughter down before she was even born. The nine months of my pregnancy I wasn't doing anything I loved, which at the time was writing for me. I was sitting on the couch feeling woe is me. I think I was on Facebook and an ad for WordPress came up and I decided I need to write. So I started a blog. A lot of what I was writing when I first started was, here is my situation and I am mad about it."
The day Ta'lor had her daughter her depression faded. "She latched to my boob and it was a wrap. I don't know what happened. I fell in love with everything about her. I was so happy I had started this blog because I knew I was doing it for her and I was going to make her proud. I still struggled financially and I still do but I choose to look at it in a healthier way. As a mom, I always say you have to show your self, self- care. You have to show your self, self-love. If you aren't doing it, you are going to cause them to repeat the same cycles."
Ta'lor is still in the midst of her journey as she navigates co-parenting, being a mother, writing her blog and practicing self-love. I asked Ta'lor to share with me the one thing she has learned in the past few years with her blog and her life. She stresses the importance of transparency. Here's what she had to say about not being transparent "it held me back from really connecting because you never know you could say that one thing about your truth and you never know who you are going to connect with because of it. So for me, it's transparency with everything and everyone. I'm really focused on that and the more I do that the more it helps in all the areas."
I asked Ta'lor what advice would you give your teen daughter, knowing what she knows now? "Loneliness should never be your excuse to have company. Pretty much, don't fill your bed with bodies because you are lonely. Which is pretty much what I was doing when I was in college. I could never be alone, I was never comfortable being by myself. I found myself filling the void with people. I was losing myself, where was me? Don't be afraid of loneliness. Learn to love it. Embrace the loneliness."
Ta'lor's spirit is so pure and contagious you can feel the love pouring out of her and into yourself. She doesn't pretend to have all the answers but through her transparency women are able to feel connected and encouraged. If you are wondering how she practices self-love with a two-year old follow her on instagram or check out her blog where she gives tips. If you are looking for a community of women focused on love, support, and healing Ta'lor has also created a Facebook group called The H.O.E Truth (Healing Over Everything).
If you have a story you think will help other mothers let me know I'd love to talk and have your voice heard. Send me an email with your info and we will set up meeting.
Sending you all the light & Love, LeeAnn
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